Our Cat, the Hooker

There are so many various thoughts running through my head, so many potential topics to write about...

But, I think one that stands out is my cat.

Scanner.




Scanner is a multi-dimensional cat. At one level, he has a self-image of being a snow leopard, quite possibly trapped in a housecat's body. At another, he is the very embodiement of Sloth. And finally, and there's no nice way to put this, he's a prostitute for being pet.

It's that last part that I'll touch on for now. Today, as with many days, he demonstrated this quality. Apparently, he has determined the school schedule for all of the neighborhood children. He knows the route they'll take coming home. And he knows who gives good petting and who does not.

In front of our house, across the street, is a stair that goes down the hill (a few hundred feet) to the school area. He positioned himself, strategically, at the top of those stairs. Any child (preferable young girls, judging by how he reacts) coming up the stairs MUST pass him by. And he knows... he knows to whom he should stretch out and gaze longingly towards while offering up a tantalizingly furbound tender tummy... and whom to ignore as he enjoys the sunbeam.

He's quite something to watch in action. Apparently, the endless doting and showers of affection he receives here are not quite sufficient to his needs. The sad part is that the top of the stairs is not his only place. He also has the Street Corner, where during different parts of the day when his favored children are in school, he targets the sweet elderly ladies out on their strolls. And he knows, too, which ones are worth his time.

When the snow leopard is not out hunting and chasing small prey, and Sloth is not recuperating from the strenous napping he's forced to endure, he is out on the street... waiting, and hoping that his usual customers come along. Dignity need not interfere with the quest of a good belly-rub.